I was going to. I just thought, oh, I guess I was right that he only ever wanted to sleep with me, I told him about some of what happened to me and the first thing he does is laugh about it behind my back...
[ He shifts up closer in one of those classic comfort me I'm sad right now moves that he thinks are a lot more subtle than they are. ]
But he says it was just a stupid joke, and it's not like that, and he's sorry... and I really think he means it.
[ Which his logical mind tells him should be the end of it. And yet. ]
[ He goes to say something but he guesses he sees that. It's not an appropriate joke but it is something similar he's seen online about girls with dad problems. Alright. Teenagers say stupid shit. ]
Well, it's good that he seems to really mean it. Does he know how upset you are about it?
[ Does he want to fix it or flunk his first year
Ah.
So that's the problem. He reaches over to pet his purple hair. ]
[ Dad, you can't flunk my boyfriend just because he's stupid.
... Maybe he can. But. Please don't. As stupid as Denki is, Hitoshi would like him to be there when he joins Heroics in April. ]
I think he knows.
[ The petting helps. He relaxes a little. ]
You don't think I was a dick for being mad about it..? Like - he - he said I was 'the usual', like 'oh, you know, the damaged ones like I always go for' - and I just felt like...
[ Cheap. Replaceable. Humiliated for having ever thought otherwise. ]
I can tell you that you're probably right in him meaning his apology. Just from the way he treats you that doesn't seem like how he feels. But you have every right to be upset.
[ For a long moment he's happy to just take the comfort offered. At some point there's one of those little sniffles, the kind that say 'I cried earlier but not anymore', but otherwise he's quiet. ]
Never that bad. But I was usually the one saying stupid things.
[ That's probably a 0% surprise. ]
I'd say anything shitty to hurt him on purpose because I didn't know any better. And then I felt like the worst person alive. Because he made me happy and didn't deserve it.
I just - when he said what he said, my first reaction was just get away from me, but then after that the idea of being without him was...
[ Like the whole world would be different. Like something huge and important would be gone forever. Like... losing the sunshine.
... Hitoshi frowns, feeling weird and lame and confused and yet somehow not, and shifts in to hide his face against his dad's side like a grumpy cat. ]
Spoil sport. This is good tea and watching him fall to his knees and cry that you're growing up would be so worth it.
[ Nevermind that they've only had him for a few years. Hizashi fell hard into his dad role. It was nice.
He keeps petting his hair. ]
Kaminari is a good person. Just remember this is your first love since your trauma. It's fine if it's real, but I want you to keep in mind it might be compensation.
[ That's comforting. He sighs quietly, relaxing again. He hates knowing that there are things he really truly can't do, and that predicting his own heart is apparently one of them - but it's at least nice to know it isn't as if he could be doing anything better.
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So you broke up with him...?
[ Because that's nearly the reaction he'd have. ]
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[ He shifts up closer in one of those classic comfort me I'm sad right now moves that he thinks are a lot more subtle than they are. ]
But he says it was just a stupid joke, and it's not like that, and he's sorry... and I really think he means it.
[ Which his logical mind tells him should be the end of it. And yet. ]
... but I'm still upset.
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Well, it's good that he seems to really mean it. Does he know how upset you are about it?
[ Does he want to fix it or flunk his first year
Ah.
So that's the problem. He reaches over to pet his purple hair. ]
You should be. That's incredibly upsetting.
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... Maybe he can. But. Please don't. As stupid as Denki is, Hitoshi would like him to be there when he joins Heroics in April. ]
I think he knows.
[ The petting helps. He relaxes a little. ]
You don't think I was a dick for being mad about it..? Like - he - he said I was 'the usual', like 'oh, you know, the damaged ones like I always go for' - and I just felt like...
[ Cheap. Replaceable. Humiliated for having ever thought otherwise. ]
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[ He keeps petting him. Helping him relax. ]
I can tell you that you're probably right in him meaning his apology. Just from the way he treats you that doesn't seem like how he feels. But you have every right to be upset.
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[ For a long moment he's happy to just take the comfort offered. At some point there's one of those little sniffles, the kind that say 'I cried earlier but not anymore', but otherwise he's quiet. ]
... He's coming over tonight.
[ You still have to be nice to him. ]
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[ He means that. ]
But otherwise, hold him accountable.
[ ... He won't be happy about it. But he'll do it. ]
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I won't.
[ It's kind of hard to imagine wanting to at all. ]
... Did dad ever say anything stupid like that to you?
[ He must have fucked up some time, right..? ]
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[ That's probably a 0% surprise. ]
I'd say anything shitty to hurt him on purpose because I didn't know any better. And then I felt like the worst person alive. Because he made me happy and didn't deserve it.
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Other than a hum of acknowledgement, he's silent for another long moment. ]
... How did you know you were in love with dad?
[ Teenagers are so subtle. ]
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... Honestly. Called out. He knew at this age. ]
When he felt like family.
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[ That's a very thoughtful 'oh'. And no further elaboration offered. ]
And... you knew when you were my age?
[ The best part is that he genuinely doesn't realize how obvious he's being. ]
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[ He grins wide. You're being obvious. ]
Just keep in mind you don't have to be us. We're atypical. Very. Most people date around quite a bit before settling.
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... I wasn't planning on anything.
[ Maybe. Probably. Maybe? ]
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[ He gives his hair a few more pets because he can. ]
Also remember you can't unring a bell.
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[ Like the whole world would be different. Like something huge and important would be gone forever. Like... losing the sunshine.
... Hitoshi frowns, feeling weird and lame and confused and yet somehow not, and shifts in to hide his face against his dad's side like a grumpy cat. ]
... don't tell dad.
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[ Nevermind that they've only had him for a few years. Hizashi fell hard into his dad role. It was nice.
He keeps petting his hair. ]
Kaminari is a good person. Just remember this is your first love since your trauma. It's fine if it's real, but I want you to keep in mind it might be compensation.
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[ He laughs a little, poking him in the hip just because it's nearby. ]
... How do I know?
[ He didn't really think about that, and now it has him worried. Can he know? Can he ever know..? ]
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[ A pause. ]
Which might not happen. I never got tempted by anyone else. Ever.
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He sits up finally, rearranging his bedhead. ]
Dad always says I'm just as stubborn as you.