[ Ugh. Hitoshi has to actually pinch the bridge of his nose. ]
When I say I could feed off you, I don't mean I could eat something off your body - hardly think you could sit still that long even if I did.
[ He's very pointedly not picturing it. The most irritating thing about an irritating straight boy is how attractive they can be when they're not threatening your life - so it's a good thing this one makes such a habit of being a jackass. ]
I mean I could feed off you. As in, actually--
[ ... No, this isn't working. ]
... you know what, nevermind. You know, this is almost an accomplishment. Only you could manage to live with a vampire this long and not notice.
[Yeah, Bakugo was going to leer a little bit to make a point because really, in a list of concerns in that scenario, whether or not someone could stay still wasn't near the top. Hygiene, for one. If they were going to be clothes or not for another. If the food was even going to be good.
That being said, his grin slipped a little bit when Dead Weight finally spit it out, his brows snapping together as a million little things slid into place. Why the fridge was almost always wide open for his use, why he looked so tired constantly, the damn curtains. Bakugo wasn't one to fling open the curtains anyway to enjoy the view or whatever stupid shit most people did it for, but that seemed like a disaster that had been waiting to happen. The fact that Dead Weight was just saying something now was either colossally stupid or he had thought that Bakugo knew.
His scowl deepening, he turned away from Dead Weight as they approached their headquarters.]
It doesn't affect me either way if you are one or not. It might even be beneficial, since if I want to keep you out of my room all I have to do is get silver and garlic.
[Are these harmful stereotypes? Maybe. Does Bakugo care all that much? No.]
[ Hitoshi bristles, and there's a remark on the tip of his tongue that absolutely will get him singed at the very least, but he keeps it back. Through some miracle. Call it being the bigger person, which isn't hard when you're a solid 6'1 and your asshole roommate apparently stopped growing both physically and emotionally when he was twelve.
(Hitoshi has no idea if Bakugou is any taller now than he was when they met. All he knows is that he at least still has the dubious honor of looking decidedly down at him.) ]
If you ever have to fight off one of us for real, I sincerely hope you do try silver and garlic.
[ That's tamer, coming out through his teeth. Yeah, try that. See how well that protects you. ]
making it up as i go let me know if i should edit???
[Emotionally twelve was still correct, considering Bakugo only reveled in making his roommate visibly annoyed. Vampire or no, he wasn't too worried about not being able to fend off anyone. But he had grown a few inches, enough to almost catch up to Dead Weight but not quite. Which was probably a battle for another day, if it was brought up.
Smirking, Bakugo didn't bother retorting as they got to the headquarters, which was already teaming with other newbie pro-heroes and pro-heroes alike. It seemed like they had called in only half of their reserves as a 'precaution', but during the briefing, Bakugo had to think even that much was too much.
There was some new group of villains who were small at the moment causing trouble, but none of them had really made a name for themselves. They had made a video saying they were going to target some rich politician, so an elite force was going to guard the politician and her family while the rest of them were stuck on patrol duty to report if they saw anything suspicious. And of course they had to use the buddy system, like first years.
Once the briefing was over, Bakugo turned to Dead Weight expectantly, head canted to the side.]
C'mon then.
[Dead Weight was right there, and Bakugo wasn't going to waste time looking for someone he could stand. It was going to be annoying either way.]
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no subject
When I say I could feed off you, I don't mean I could eat something off your body - hardly think you could sit still that long even if I did.
[ He's very pointedly not picturing it. The most irritating thing about an irritating straight boy is how attractive they can be when they're not threatening your life - so it's a good thing this one makes such a habit of being a jackass. ]
I mean I could feed off you. As in, actually--
[ ... No, this isn't working. ]
... you know what, nevermind. You know, this is almost an accomplishment. Only you could manage to live with a vampire this long and not notice.
no subject
[Yeah, Bakugo was going to leer a little bit to make a point because really, in a list of concerns in that scenario, whether or not someone could stay still wasn't near the top. Hygiene, for one. If they were going to be clothes or not for another. If the food was even going to be good.
That being said, his grin slipped a little bit when Dead Weight finally spit it out, his brows snapping together as a million little things slid into place. Why the fridge was almost always wide open for his use, why he looked so tired constantly, the damn curtains. Bakugo wasn't one to fling open the curtains anyway to enjoy the view or whatever stupid shit most people did it for, but that seemed like a disaster that had been waiting to happen. The fact that Dead Weight was just saying something now was either colossally stupid or he had thought that Bakugo knew.
His scowl deepening, he turned away from Dead Weight as they approached their headquarters.]
It doesn't affect me either way if you are one or not. It might even be beneficial, since if I want to keep you out of my room all I have to do is get silver and garlic.
[Are these harmful stereotypes? Maybe. Does Bakugo care all that much? No.]
no subject
(Hitoshi has no idea if Bakugou is any taller now than he was when they met. All he knows is that he at least still has the dubious honor of looking decidedly down at him.) ]
If you ever have to fight off one of us for real, I sincerely hope you do try silver and garlic.
[ That's tamer, coming out through his teeth. Yeah, try that. See how well that protects you. ]
making it up as i go let me know if i should edit???
Smirking, Bakugo didn't bother retorting as they got to the headquarters, which was already teaming with other newbie pro-heroes and pro-heroes alike. It seemed like they had called in only half of their reserves as a 'precaution', but during the briefing, Bakugo had to think even that much was too much.
There was some new group of villains who were small at the moment causing trouble, but none of them had really made a name for themselves. They had made a video saying they were going to target some rich politician, so an elite force was going to guard the politician and her family while the rest of them were stuck on patrol duty to report if they saw anything suspicious. And of course they had to use the buddy system, like first years.
Once the briefing was over, Bakugo turned to Dead Weight expectantly, head canted to the side.]
C'mon then.
[Dead Weight was right there, and Bakugo wasn't going to waste time looking for someone he could stand. It was going to be annoying either way.]